Grateful at 45

I am sitting in my dining room typing this. The girls are in one room, playing with LEGO, which they had long abandoned, but decided to resurrect during their break from our haphazard homeschooling. The boys are doing school work or watching YouTube and/or still sleeping. My husband is on a work call in his home office and I am here. We are ALL here indefinitely. Thanks COVID-19.

On the table is this morning’s coffee mug, a Google Chromebook, a deck of cards to play BOLD, an open and upside down copy of Anne of Green Gables, a finished 2000 piece puzzle, a school folder and notebook and a myriad of writing utensils. The television is off and the air conditioning is blowing since it is already quite warm on this March 25th.

Tomorrow is my birthday. Brandon ordered me a cake (well, two cakes, but as far was we can tell by the lack of response, the bundt cake place is closed so he moved on to a grocery store cake). We were supposed to go to one of my favorite restaurants for dinner (just us) but now that idea seems a little selfish because the people I want to be with on my birthday are already all here.

Although, full disclosure, I was really looking forward to the meal.

Today is one of my “friends” (an acquaintance actually) on Facebook birthday and last night I watched a video of hers. In the recording she listed what she is grateful for learning in her last year of life. I decided I would grab that idea and share my list here. Old school blogging at it’s best, right? 😉

I am grateful that I have learned how to adapt. We have all had to adapt quite a bit this year! Blending a family is no small task and can be QUITE daunting at times. I have adjusted my ways of thinking as a wife, a parent and an individual. My ability to do this in the past has not been the best but with major life events, usually come other big changes. I honestly had NO idea how much I would have to adapt (!!!), however we take it day by day and do our best to love each other through the struggles. Most days are really good for that reason.

I am grateful I have learned bookkeeping (and other new skills). In line with the adapting, I have taken on a few additional roles at my job this last year and I am pretty dang proud of myself for working through the challenge of learning new skills and applying them. I wear a few different “hats” at our office now and I am grateful especially for my employers, who have believed in me from the get-go. I am also thankful I continue to have a job (especially right now!)

I am grateful for my husband. This may go without saying, but I need to mention it, even though it may seem like a platitude. It is a full-on TRUTH. Does he get on my nerves sometimes? Yes. Has it been interesting learning to live with another person at this point in my life? Yes. However, even when we fight (which we do), we always come back together, mostly because of him. I take a while to process things. He just wants us to resolve things, move on and be happy and together. He is my calm in the storm. He is my constant. I am so, so grateful I get to do life with him. Also, he does the majority of the laundry so I am keeping him. 😉

I am grateful for these kids. They teach me something pretty much every day. Mostly patience. 😉 But really… we have really good kids. At least compared to some I have heard about. LOL. They are nowhere near perfect and this last year has given me a few reasons to want to run away, but I would not change it even though. Is it hard to learn to raise kids you have not known from birth? Yep. But it’s just as challenging to raise kids you did (teenagers, AHEM). For real.

I am grateful for our home. This last year we have had to replace a few things in this kinda old house, and sometimes certain areas feel tight when all seven of us are here together. Despite feeling cramped at times, we have a beautiful home. Brandon has majorly adapted by moving in here and getting rid of some of his things. I am oh-so-grateful for his willingness to make this his home (and the kids too!) Thankfully we also sold his other house at the beginning of this year and we are free of a second mortgage. Our home is my refuge and I enjoy coming into my kitchen after work and making a meal for everyone (most days…) and watching all the activity around me. I also really enjoy retreating to my bedroom, also my sanctuary, at the end of a long day.

I am grateful for my (and our) health. This one seems especially pertinent right now. I made a choice in mid-January to sign up for Weight Watchers and I have lost around 10 pounds. Mardi Gras celebrations threw me off a little in February and now we are homebound for a while, so the are more temptations to eat unfortunately. I don’t really have this grand weight loss goal, I just want to fit back into my clothes better and feel less tired, etc. We are all well and healthy right now and I hope and pray that continues through these virus-laden days.

Lastly, I am grateful for my extended family (my parents, siblings, etc.). My parents had a house fire back in late January and although they did not lose everything, many things were damaged and they are living in another house right now while their house is cleaned out and repaired. MOST OF ALL, I am glad they are okay. My brothers, my sisters-in-law, my nieces and nephews have all shown up for my parents and done their best to keep me in the loop with everything going on with their house. We were supposed to go visit them this weekend but have decided not to for obvious reasons. I miss my family but am thankful I can stay in touch via today’s technology and am so grateful my parents are being well taken care of since I cannot be there.

Tomorrow I will be 45 years old and I am extremely grateful for that! I am in a very good place in my life. The learning and growing continues each year and even though I am sure my list will be similar next year at this time, I hope I can also add some new things. This year of my life I hope to grow (emotionally, LOL) and “stretch” in even more ways. I would say I may not be able to top getting remarried and becoming “mom” to two more kids but well, you never know! Ha ha! I deem this next year of my life the year of Acceptance. To accept those things I cannot control and to accept my loved ones where they are and for who they are. These things are not always easy for me, however I have resolved to do my best and that is the best I can do!

Here’s to a new year! Cheers!