Ripped Jeans Wrangler

I really, really like clothes and shopping. I was a merchandising major for gosh sakes, it’s pretty much a requirement. I mean, if I’m not wearing something “trendy”, those girls I went to college with in the 90’s are going to find me on Facebook and totally call me out on it, right? Okay, we know that’s not entirely true, but still, fashion is my thang.

I’ve always been an avid clothes shopper and appreciate the knock-offs that stores like Target and Old Navy offer. And Marshall’s is pretty much my favorite store (for home stuff too, Holla!!!, Home Goods!) I’m also completely happy that my city now has a Nordstrom Rack. My shoe rack thanks you but not my bank account.

Anyway, all this to say that I like to wear the trendy stuff, even at 41, and probably will in some way forever. I believe clothes are one of the best ways to express myself and I feel really good about myself when I go out in a well-fitted, comfortable, yet attractive outfit.  So, back in the spring, I hit up the new “Rack” store and bought myself a few things with birthday money from my mom (she has always been my shopping enabler, God bless her!). “Buy yourself something nice,” she said.

I found myself checking out the rack of jeans that already had some wear and literal tear in them. I realized my mom probably wasn’t thinking of this when she said “something nice”, but oh well. I could also hear my father’s voice…. See, as we know these type of jeans were also pretty popular back in the 80’s (everything comes back around again have you seen the chokers and culottes lately?) and I recall him telling my brothers that he could NOT understand why someone would want to buy clothing that was already torn. He just didn’t get it – he still used hankies and wore sideburns back then.

(oh gosh, he STILL wears sideburns…! He’s so cute…)

I digress.

Anyway, I tried on three different pair and decided on some that fit well and were not too torn, but just enough to make the statement of “I know what’s in right now”.

Then.

I tried to put them on when I got home. Don’t worry, I was successful, but only after a minor mishap. See, the tear near the knee on the right leg of these jeans is now a bit bigger… THANK THE GOOD LORD ABOVE there was no one watching me get dressed that morning, because I completely fell on my ass (it’s okay, take a moment to picture it, I’ll wait). See, my big toe got stuck in the trendy tear area and I hopped back a few times before my midlife lack-of-balance betrayed me, and my derriere made itself one with the tile.

At first I sat there with my jaw dropped, in disbelief at what just transpired, but I quickly started laughing like a damn hyena. I couldn’t believe my clothing actually assisted in such a debacle. My “torn” jeans were dangerous and hilarious all at the same time. The only other time I could remember something like this happening was when I had a particularly hard time taking a sports bra off one morning and I sort of fell onto my bed. That was more of a fed-up type fall though. This other one was totally legit.

The things we do for fashion… seriously. Now I have to really pay attention when I put these jeans on because…. well…  don’t think this hasn’t happened again. The big-toe-stuck part, not the falling on my tuckus part. Do we ever learn?

Fashion Rules.

 

 

Writing every day this month for #NaBloPoMo.