Towards the end of last year I discovered the song “Brand New” by Ben Rector. The kids and I sang and danced to it over and over around the house, and every time we listened we smiled and had the best time. You might say we wore it out. The video is so great because…
Butterflies All Around
I’ve seen so many butterflies lately. They fly in front of my van while parked at a light or I see them while waiting to the get the kids at school, walking around the neighborhood with Ollie, or just about anywhere. Beautiful bright yellow ones and orange and black ones. Every time I see one I…
Scattered
A friend of mine said the other day that she felt “scattered” and I immediately thought, “Me too.” It’s sort of hard for me to focus lately. There are so many things I want to do, with regards to my writing and other goals that I have. But meanwhile… I am in the midst of…
Don’t Judge Me Because of My Divorce
My marriage was supposed to work out. It was supposed to be the marriage of all marriages. It was going to last forever and yes, have it’s ups and downs, but we, as a unit, were going to get through all those downs. There would be romance and love and hearts most of the time….
Dependent on Him
I used to think that my happiness depended on other people. I would get so upset and irritated when they did not act the way I wanted or expected them to. I will be completely honest, I wanted everyone in my life to fit inside some perfect little box, or imaginary boundaries of behavior that…
Behind the Wiper
I kind of hope it doesn’t rain anytime soon because there’s a leaf stuck behind the left windshield wiper on my van. I want it to stay because it reminds me of the changing season(s) and resilience, which are more metaphors for my life right now. I realize I’ve been writing in metaphors a lot lately. But…
Don’t Cry For Me…
Last night I had a good cry. I don’t cry that much anymore. I mean, sure, I cry sometimes, just like any normal 40-ish year old woman. But I do not cry nearly as much as I did about 10 months ago., or even six. Last year at this time this week I was still…
A Random Saturday
The only two sounds I hear are the dryer as the clothes tumble around in the heat, and the air conditioner, blowing so hard, trying to combat the stifling heat outside. I look toward the window, the bright sun causing shadows on the blinds, large wood stripes across the panes to keep things out. I…
Opening the Door
I opened the door. I let you in. At first it was just barely ajar, when I saw your smile. You showed your true self to me, over and over. I couldn’t believe it. I wanted to open the door wider. I wanted to have you close. But then I closed it back a bit Too…
Alone Time
I have to turn on the t.v. because it’s just too quiet without them here. I have it on mostly just for background noise, occasionally I really watch. This helps my brain pretend that it’s not just me and the dog in the house. Or something like that. There are a million things I could do, like clean…