One minute they are shaken up while two kids fight over the front part of the Target cart. And both cry. And I negotiate the best I know how.
We spend too much time touching every Lego box (well, Little G does anyway) and we are almost late to pick up big brother from "church school". We had to find the kids' favorite yogurt before we left, which was on the other side of the mile-long store. I have a love/hate relationship with the "Super" part of my favorite store.
At home I rush to make tacos for dinner and the The B Man smashes the avocados with a fork, like a pro while I dice up the onions and tomatoes. The kids gather together to eat our appetizer and I feel less jumbled and like things are coming together again.
But then... dinner is the usual circus.
The B Man eats quickly and gets up. Little G picks at his food and is quickly distracted by a toy and his fast-eater sibling, who rises. K is up and down and out of her chair and by the door to the garage and we forgot to say the blessing and I just want to eat my ONE taco. But G has to pee and K does too and she actually goes on the Potty (woot!). But oh, I'm still hungry since I've only taken two bites...
Tim comes home just in time for me to leave for the run I have needed to run all day. And I do and I can feel my lungs breathing in all the air they need and my legs go and go and go as I decompress. It feels amazing.
When I return all kids are in bed but Little G is up to his usual night-time antics, keeping his brother from the sleep he needs. Tim is back off to work so it is up to me to get the boys to rest. G grabs a couple of stuffies as I shuffle him off to my room and into my bed while I shower.
I come out and G is as awake as ever, bright eyed and bushy-tailed. Lights out, I say and cover him with the duvet, only his sweet face poking out.
In the kitchen I make my tea and grab a little snack and get the ice pack for my ankle from the freezer.
And then K cries. She lost her paci so I replace it, cover her and pat her back. She's back off to dream land.
I can see light from under my bedroom door and cutie G is still up. Big surprise. He asks me to snuggle him and I know that will be the only way he will settle this night, so I capitulate. He snuggles in close, draping his leg over mine and my nose lands in his hair and smells the essence of little boy.
He whispers in the dark, "I love you, Mommy".
And my heart parts are all back together again.